unicidades

I had a great weekend with my dad. We went to North Miami on Saturday and while I took my first private with Luna Palacios he was there waiting for me watching and enjoying the class. Then we went for a walk on the beach. We came home after that and I had to go out to dinner with my co-workers. When I came home, we figured how to change the channels on my new TV (thanks to F.) and watched TV together for a while. We actually watched the Wizard of Oz. Old Post from Archives. 

I don’t know if it’s an American thing to want it all, but certainly it was in this country that I started to feel that I needed to work harder to have it all. Here I came to realize that I want it all, that it is possible. My all might be too much, might be too little. It’s, actually, well, all . The key, I guess, is that you have to define all . All depends on how you want to feel during the present, now holds you and belongs to you. All is part of you and also depends on what you’re going to get out of what you do - be it your job, be it who you are, be it just the way you’re going to wake in the morning. Ultimately, it seems like what is going to feel like to be you depends on your definition of all. Is all your ultimate goal? Is it your path? On what side of the road are you? Are you crossing it slowly? Or you’re just running to get to the other side? What if there’s more than one other side? What if you decide to stop for a good laugh? What if you realize that at some po...

Faz como o mar. Vem para mim e segura minhas mãos e me embala. Canta para mim. Me mostra e me desvenda. Deixa eu olhar nos teus olhos, mergulhando no teu mundo, escrevendo cartas para ti. Povoa meus lábios de sal. De mini asas -- para que eu possa voar ao lembrar de ti. Para que eu seja leve. E tenha sempre um sonho bom com o qual navegar. Um sonho de a-mar . Imagem de Jim Dine

O Mamoeiro de Tarsila do Amaral O Moleskine sempre fica ao lado da cama acompanhado de uma caneta. Um copo de água junto aos livros que estou tentando ler. O sono me assalta repentinamente. E as palavras saltitam dentro de mim. Quando me roubam o sono, acendo a luz, e tento acompanhar a velocidade com que me assediam. Noite passada escrevi que o mar ao amanhecer é como um exílio: sua claridade ofusca, mas traz um novo dia.

- It says that you have movie X. I can't find it. -Sure. Maybe it's in the back. Let me go check. A few seconds later. The movie is not in the back. - Maybe you don't know the alphabet? Signed: Me, The Mean.

When I was little, I used to find it beautiful when people walked on the beach in wintertime. I liked seeing them wearing sweaters on the beach and just walking. Sunsets and sunrises at the beach are probably my favorite time. The solitude of the beach attracts me.

La gente, que es brutal cuando se ensaña, la gente, que es feroz cuando hace un mal, buscó para hacer títeres en su guiñol, la imagen de tu amor y mi esperanza... A mí, ¿qué me importaba tu pasado...? si tu alma entraba pura a un porvenir. Dichoso abrí los brazos a tu afán y con mi amor salimos, de payasos, a vivir. Fue inútil gritar que querías ser buena. Fue estúpido aullar la promesa de tu redención... La gente es brutal y odia siempre al que sueña, lo burla y con risas despeña su intento mejor... Tu historia y mi honor desnudaos en la feria, bailaron su danza de horror, sin compasión... Tu angustia comprendió que era imposible, luchar contra la gente es infernal. Por eso me dejaste sin decirlo, ¡amor!... y fuiste a hundirte al fin en tu destino. Tu vida desde entonces fue un suicidio, vorágine de horrores y de alcohol. Anoche te mataste ya del todo y mi emoción te llora en tu descanso... ¡Corazón! Quisiera que Dios amparara tu sueño. muñeca de amor que no pudo alcanzar su ilusión....

I watched Violeta Went To Heaven on my way to Argentina. Based on Violeta Parra's life, the movie retells her story from childhood. She was impressive.

I dislike waiting. Maybe because I have waited for so long.

Picture by J9.

Self-Portrait Maybe I have given up on being happy. My sister-in-law is expecting. My days are bitter. Motherhood startles me with its silent presence in me. Love has never seen more distant. Yet, so close.  He asked me: why don't you have dinner with me? I wonder: would I be able not to fall again? Are you jumping the gun? I suspect: You just want a fling. Maybe. Love is not for me. For us. Let's play. My most beautiful essays don't live here anymore. Is it because beauty has left? Or is it because I am just too busy to think about what is happening. I used to write long emails. Now I write short text messages. Maybe my style has changed and there's only so much I can do. 

I wonder in my wild dreams of forests what your lips taste like Wonder if you like kissing as much as you like traveling I wonder how you kiss if you'd hold me tight as if you were afraid I might walk away Honey salt thyme in the sun a dreamy forest what's it like to kiss you? How soft would feel to taste I cannot do anything but wonder in my wild dreams of unbalanced decisions soaring desire what kissing you tastes like then awake and sleepless I remember you are a boy sinking me drowning me silly me you are a boy

Photo by J9. Dania Beach, last Sunday. This coming Sunday I will go for an audition in Miami. I don't have any hopes to get the part, but I will do my best. the audition is for an Opera. This Sunday is very important to Venezuela. I promised one of my friends that if Capriles wins, I will dress yellow, red and blue on Monday.  On Tuesday, I have an interview for a transfer and on the following Tuesday, I will interview for a promotion. It is difficult to explain, even though I don't have any hopes of getting any of these things, I have some other kind of hope.  I am reading the "Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life" by Rosenthal. I have been asked this week if I am Jewish. I have long forgotten what it is like to feel like you want to be something else other than what you are, but sometimes I wish I were. Maybe because of their sense of humor. I know I am generalizing it, but I have encountered through books and in real life too are. I have this ...