unicidades

Here I am at the ref. desk stuffing my face with Hershey kisses. I think I had six of them. The plain ones. I prefer the ones with nuts, so you can munch on some texture there, but ok. I got away with it. So, the calendar tells me the year's ending. People have also made it clear. People have been asking me if I am going to go to the special New Year's Eve. milonga and I've been saying no. One of the places charges $65 for the special night, another one charges $55. I've been told it's a beautiful party, but still I find it very expensive. A regular milonga costs $10 to $15 depending on where you go. I know they'll have a special dinner on the 31st, but I don't care for that. I care for the dancing. Honestly, I'd rather not be in a crowded milonga where everybody is going to be eating and drinking like crazy and the dancing is going to be relegated to a second plan. Also, I like being in a cozy environment to wait for the new year. Last year I went t...

Happy New Year.

I read because I want to educate myself. I wonder because that shows me some new ways. I write because I want to document my existence. Today is a weird day. I had such a nice 3 day holiday weekend and yet today I feel a prisoner of my own choices. My choices in general. Happiness is so, so fleeting. G-d has a very weird sense of humour. Time unfolds and every day is like a new odyssey. I started writing my new year's resolutions list. I have 10 items written down. I have to remember to write my will too. When I was at the hospital a few weeks ago, I wasn't afraid of dying per se. I think I was afraid of leaving unfinished business behind me. I was also afraid that my last wishes would die with me. Nostalgia. How could it be that perfection could be a curse? Expectations do tend to leave a bitter taste in people's mouths. On Wednesday morning I am going to go see her. Why? I don't know. Sometimes I think she has more problems than I do and that's only if I am kind e...

Tenho a mesa posta de amor.

After many years, I am looking forward to tonight. Not that I like the crazy shopping and the crazy people. But I like the idea of staying home and celebrating. Obviously, I celebrate for the wrong reasons. I guess I am not a good Catholic and I honestly don't care. Merry Christmas to all.

I need to buy flowers. The house isn't clean yet. I have so much cooking to do. What stresses me out is not having all the ingredients yet. This dinner party I have to go to also stresses me out. What am I going to talk about with people who are complete strangers? At least the restaurant is nice. I haven't been eating out lately. The medication is strong and I feel tired all the time. I am tired, but happy. I need to take new photos. Dancing tango with my Comme il Faut is a cosmic experience. People might say I am crazy and I don't know shit about Argentine tango dancing, but I don't care. Am I going to write a New Year's resolutions list? Pomegranate is probably one of my favorite fruits. I am reading Tolstoy and a book on whole foods based on Eastern teachings, in particular Chinese. Both amazing readings. My dad e-mailed me. I miss Christmas in Brazil. I think I am wearing my new Chinese inspired white and red dress tomorrow night. I learned something new ab...

I hate parents who mistreat children.