Growing up

An image that speaks.

Look: do you see it in my eyes? Can't you see I'm a different person? Can't you see that I'm not afraid of anything? Can't you see that what I feel is what I live amidst silences and dances, all the laughter and all the jazzy nights? Can't you see that freedom has gotten me intrigued and in love? My freedom is a red painted wall – still fresh - that doesn’t match any other hues I’ve seen. I know you know I have this obsession-like-love-of-mine for the things that are or feel unique. Let’s improvise a little here. Give me your hand, I will take you out of your comfort zone. Let’s dance to this song. Let’s create a song here that makes you aware. In tune: percussion, words, senses, fragments of a smell we can only imagine. Treasure me. Look for the hidden smells of love. Don’t ever take this for granted. Can’t you see that time is running faster and faster and we can’t afford to lose each other? Don’t think that you are what you have, what you own. Don’t be a slave of your possessions. At the beginning of something else, you’re all alone with the things you have experienced - not the things you’ve bought or possessed. We own nothing.

I don’t make sense, I know - as all the souls that burn and live the contradictions of passion, the burdens of being alive, the sweetness of holding you and hiding from you in the next minute. I don’t find balance, I don’t look for balance. I don’t want a pale balance to sustain me. My rhyme is awkward – as awkward as my prose. My metaphors don’t grab your attention, my jokes are pale, my sublimities are a butterfly you cannot catch and a dream you can only see when you’re not awake, but it becomes less faded if you wake up. Look at me: my body is aching, words are being thrown at you, I am, I am, solid, liquid, vapor sounds.

I don’t want to pass by. I want to wrap myself around life and smile my best smile: A pure smile that conquers nothing, a sincere smile that may sound like a cliché. And if it does, you’re just not getting it. I am growing, I am growing.

Can you see me now?

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