2019

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Image by Dan Garver - Title: The Twin Boats

Here we are again, at the verge of another year that ends. 

This year in particular left me with many stories to tell. I have yet to make up with myself and reunite my soul to music. My father passed away. I started school. It feels like I live another life. I feel somewhat safe. There is a shy hope peaking at the horizon. And yet there were many moments in which I just succumbed to thoughts of you and delusional hopes. 

What is in me that sings to this new cycle? I visited Turkey in July. Somehow my excitement towards things has diminished. I have been remolding my perceptions of the world. The enthusiasm that I once exhibited somehow has been hiding. Tango feeling has been hiding. I saw you in 2019. I looked in your eyes again. Amidst the fog. I was surprised there wasn't much emotion on your part. You are always a shadow. I am afraid you will always be. We are twin boats that collide because they share the same route. So, if there's one image that can describe the year, it's this image that I named The Twin Boats. My year was foggy. Slow, sluggish. There was good and there was bad. The possibility Manolo could have been sick scared me to death. I am tired and feel defeated in a way that I can't explain. We are still made of the same essence. Dreaming the same dream and yet thousands of miles away. 

Song: 


Assim te quero guardar
Como se mais nada houvesse
Nem futuro, nem passado
De tanto, tanto te amar
Pedi a Deus que trouxesse
O teu corpo no meu fado


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